Blessed Samhain, witches!

Speaking of… what exactly is a witch?

Defining what a witch is is a lot like defining what a woman is; it’s practically impossible without excluding someone. A witch is a practitioner of the occult, a pagan, anyone who just wants to have a little more magic in their lives, or even just a mean old lady. It’s a word that has been reclaimed from oppressors as the witch is stepping into their power and autonomy. The term is primarily associated with women, but it’s important to remember that men were also killed for being witches, and anyone of any gender can be a witch.

However, I feel compelled to add that if you are a man who wants to call himself a witch in today’s era, it’s important to ask yourself why. A couple years ago, I learned that an old acquaintance (a man who I would describe as violently misogynistic as he casually told me and my partner about his fantasies about sexual violence at a party on two separate occasions) was live streaming tarot readings and calling himself a witch. Now, I fully believe that people can change and I will always be against gate-keeping, but this still rubbed me the wrong way. This man had once mansplained how he took care of his long hair that he’d had for a few years when I got so depressed that I neglected to take care of the long hair I’d had for over two decades. If you are a man in witchcraft spaces, it is essential that you understand that these spaces are not made for you, even if you’re welcome in them. For what might be for the first time in your life, you must understand that your voice is not the most important one in these spaces, and is very likely not needed at all. The word ‘witch’ has a lot of historical context for women. Don’t speak over the group of people who have had that word used against them. Don’t assume you are an authority in these spaces. Basically, don’t be Ryan Gosling in La La Land.

I say all of that not to deter anyone from calling themselves a witch, but as a preface to what being a witch is to me. A witch, like a woman, is anyone who calls themselves one, and is prepared for the ramifications of the word. Because at the end of the coven meeting, if you are a cisgender man, you are able to leave and navigate society with all the privilege that you are awarded by a mere accident of your birth. For the rest of your coven, they likely were drawn to witchcraft as a way to reclaim the power and autonomy that was stripped from them by people who look like you. Power and autonomy that you have never been denied. Because feminism and witchcraft have been inextricably linked over the years, and the recent resurgence is undoubtedly due to the current attack on women and our rights. Many women are were drawn to something that empowers them as they watch their legal rights to their bodily autonomy get ripped to shreds. If you don’t have a uterus or need medical assistance on your path to womanhood, you cannot understand what that feels like. And to be clear, I specify legal right because no one has the right to violate anyone’s bodily autonomy.

Apologies for the lecture, back to the point. Amie asked me to think about what a witch means to me since I’m a relative newbie, and it would be a good way to set an intention for my practice. And intention is the keyword for me. Intention is most important component for any spell. Witches mindfully choose ingredients and words to call on energies and symbolically manifest their will. I used to think I needed to craft spells like I was baking a cake (and I’ve never been very good at baking). You gather your very specific ingredients, say a carefully chosen incantation, and BOOM. Magic. But only if you did everything exactly right. If you didn’t, the cake won’t rise, or it’ll taste weird, or the texture will be a nightmare.

And to a certain extent, that’s kind of true. But now I’m learning that magic is more like cooking than baking. A little of this, a pinch of whatever you have in your pantry- whatever feels right. Oh you don’t have that specific hard to find crystal? Clear quartz is fine too. It’s just as much about the symbolism and intention as the ingredients.

For example, last night my partner and I performed a little memorial/invitation/protection ritual. Last December, we unexpectedly lost our cat, Malcolm, and we wanted to do something on Samhain to remember him. We also wanted to invite his spirit, if it still lingers, and make sure he always feels welcome in our home. We wanted to ask if he would still be our guardian, as he was when he was alive, and we promised that he would never be forgotten. So we set up an alter for him, burned a couple candles through the night, left out an offering of catnip, toys, and treats, mindfully chose ingredients that were both personal and symbolic, and put his spell jars in the four cardinal directions of our home so that he could protect us if he chose to. Needless to say, it was emotional and healing. And maybe it was all in my head, but I could swear I could feel his presence rubbing against my leg and purring.

We miss you, little buddy. Rest in peace.

To me, a witch is someone who moves through the world with intention. A witch honors themselves and the world around them, especially the natural world. They strive for wisdom and balance in all things. They connect to their history, and, yes, the sisterhood of all the witches who came before them. And these are all things I want to be reflected in my practice as I use it as a vessel for my own self discovery and empowerment.

So what is a witch? Well, if you’re here, that could be you! Or maybe that word is a still a little scary. Maybe you’re still untangling that word from all the negative connotations that have been (nonconsensually) assigned to it. And that’s perfectly fine. Your journey is your own, and no one can has the right to force an identity on you. Maybe you’re just curious about what witchcraft is all about, and we’re here to help!

Since I’m still learning and trying to set up a regular practice, I would like to invite anyone who wants to join me in my Thirty Days of Witchcraft Challenge: each day I will try to incorporate something witchy into my everyday life, and I will post my progress here every Friday in November as well as some ideas for the following week. Starting with today, I cleansed my home with a simmer pot, read some tarot for guidance, and blessed my front door with cinnamon for abundance. This week, I’m going to learn more about and try grounding, cleansing, and warding. There will also be some “Sick Witch Tips,” which are some low effort ways to honor your practice when you’re low on energy, and some research along the way.

So I hope you’ll join me, and maybe you’ll learn what being a witch means to you. Happy new year!

– Sage